If I Were a Thief... I'd Steal (2013) film poster — UK streaming guide

Where to watch If I Were a Thief... I'd Steal (2013) in the UK

If I Were a Thief... I'd Steal (2013) is not currently listed on any UK streaming, rental, or purchase service. Last verified on 16 May 2026 by ScreenSearch.

1920s. Vitalino, a small farmer from São Vicente sees his father die of the epidemic which decimated the country. Some years later, of all the brothers, Vitalino is the strongest and takes his father’s place in the house. But the village is too small for his aspirations and he decides to head to Brazil, leaving his sisters in charge of the household. In parallel with Vitalino’s story, If I Were a Thief… I’d Steal portrays the world of Paulo Rocha rummaging through his films and ghosts over the years.

  • Film
  • 2013
  • 100 min
  • ★ 5.4/10 TMDB
  • Drama

Streaming options in the United Kingdom

Updated daily from The Movie Database. Outbound links open the provider directly.

We couldn't find any current UK streaming, rental, or purchase listings for If I Were a Thief... I'd Steal.

This may be because: (a) the title hasn't been released in the UK yet, (b) it's on physical media only, or (c) the licence has temporarily lapsed. Streaming availability changes frequently — check back daily.

Last verified: — sourced from The Movie Database. Machine-readable: Markdown · JSON.

Cast & crew

Top-billed cast in If I Were a Thief... I'd Steal.

DirectorPaulo Rocha
WritersRegina Guimarães, Paulo Rocha, João Viana

More drama on UK streaming

Browse other titles in the same genres, refreshed daily.

Drama filmsUK availability

See what else is on each service right now.

Drama on NetflixUK availabilityDrama on Prime VideoUK availabilityDrama on Disney+UK availabilityDrama on Apple TV+UK availabilityDrama on Paramount+UK availabilityDrama on NOWUK availability

If I Were a Thief... I'd Steal — frequently asked questions

Where can I watch If I Were a Thief... I'd Steal in the UK?

If I Were a Thief... I'd Steal (2013) is not currently listed by any UK streaming, rental, or purchase service in our daily-updated TMDB feed. It may be on physical media, an aggregator, or pending a UK release. Check back later — availability changes frequently.

Is If I Were a Thief... I'd Steal on Netflix, Disney+ or Amazon Prime Video in the UK?

If I Were a Thief... I'd Steal is not currently included with any major UK subscription service. It may still be available to rent or buy.

How accurate is this film's availability data?

Availability is sourced from The Movie Database (TMDB), which in turn pulls from JustWatch. Listings are refreshed daily. For purchase decisions, the provider's own site is the source of truth.

Looking for something else?

ScreenSearch indexes over a million films and TV shows. Type any title to instantly find where it's streaming in the UK.

Search any title